The colourful festival celebrated on the last Full moon on the Lunar Month of Phalguna at the end of the winter season.
Generally, it takes place either in late February or early March.
People leave their sorrows behind and indulge in pure fun with a splash of vibrant colours.
Many people though, claim Holi to be as hazardous as Diwali for it has an adverse effect on the water and soil.
Every year, people are encouraged not to use synthetic colours as they might cause fatal problems to the skin, but few people lend an ear to that, mostly due to the exorbitant cost of the herbal colours. The synthetic colours contain harmful stuff like PbO,HgSO4,AgBr,CuSO4 and Prussian Blue and these might cause eczema,dermatitis,allergy and the big daddy of all…skin cancer!
Precautionary measures are also made available to the commoners,
But who cares right??
The Holi swag is incomplete if the “bandor rong” doesn’t stay for at least a couple of days.
Widows were allowed to celebrate Holi this year at Vrindavan, thereby breaking a 400 year old tradition!
Tradition?? Nah!! It’s a bloody Prejudice!
Some parched villages celebrated dry holi this year, that is, they abolished the use of water and played only with abir! They deserve my salute!
Also that, colours were substituted with cow dung and urine in some parts!!
Yes, you read it right!!
Cow dung and Urine!
In, Much Ado About Nothing, we read about a masked ball, we also use masks here in Holi, but for a very different reason!
It’s not that we don’t want to get ourselves coloured, it’s due to the fear of being turned to an (quoting the bard) ETHIOPE!
Big Boys in gangs patrol the streets in the hunt of a relatively humane face an on finding, vandalise it with something that resembles coal tar!
The wisdom that our elders give during the celebration is “karur chokhe mukhe rong dibi na” but we aim for that headshot don’t we? 😛
There is always that one guy who gets pissed off when we spray colours at him, and I have never seen anyone singing “khelbo holi rong debo na tai kokhono hoi??” at that time! I mean come onn! That’s the opportune moment!
Bollywood has somehow managed to make anything white, the official uniform of Holi! All these actors wear the crisp-est of kurtas and salwars for the occasion, we are a bit special in that respect, rugged looking clothes spring out of nowhere before Holi, which is ultimately destined to be the all important “POCHHA”!
TV shows have an entirely different view point; “Holi special” episodes turn up during this time as the terrible tales of troublesome families take a tumultuous toll. I would love to imagine a Christmas Special of Game of Thrones where John Snow will finally with snow with the men of the nights Watch!
Normal People play holi in the lanes or open fields! But No! Modern Society has a take on everything as it’s too mainstream!
Various European-like-named clubs who present a
Splash *what not?*(featuring DJ Hubba)
Which is a big pain in the dash!
“Rang barse” and “Ballam Pichkari” are the anthems of this festival and people go nuts listening to em after having pleased the mighty Shiva which we also know as “Baba sheba”.
Social Media gets all crammed up with the posts of #boshontoswag and “Can u rcgnise me???” !!!
It’s great to be a part of all this! But it’s equally depressing not to be!!
Damn you boards!
*cries in the corner*
Thank you for reading about my take on Holi, (yes its over… yaay!!) , I hope that I haven’t offended you or hurt your feelings! If I have I am sorry for being such a cynical jerk, it’s only meant for fun!
-THE CYNICAL GOBBLEDEGOOKER
thank you for reading!